Op/Ed: Having It All Without Having Babies



  1. A comprehensive breakdown of statements issued without any real correlation to facts. Particularly that baseless claim about intelligence – less likely to procreate. What BS.

    A well-spoken article. I’d really like to see what others – male and female – think of this. There is already incredible pressure on us all as a society and as individuals, to succeed, to push ourselves ever onward. What if we’re fine just the way we are, have been through tough times and are perfectly happy just treading water, without the need to put yet more people on this planet, which is already struggling to contain us?

    The more articles such as this actually detail the somewhat hazy equations between procreation = apex of achievement, the better individuals can feel about their own personal achievements.


    1. So true, I think there’s enough crap about making sure that we tick off all our goals, without adding the extra pressure of what it says about your take on feminism if you decide to have babies and put your plans on hold.

      The point is, this is my choice, it’s your choice, it’s an individual decision. No one gets to tell me what it means for my life, what it says about me as a person, or a woman, or an Indian, or anything else!


  2. Maybe things are different in other places / at other times, but I do think that maintaining one’s existing lifestyle after having children is difficult in the uk now because of the cost. I know I would struggle to do the things I like while providing for another human, and that is presuming that I continued to work full time with grandparents providing child care. More realistic would be the equivalent of half my wage going to child care or me leaving my job as the lower wage earner in the house (and I’d frankly sulk if I’d had to be at home doing the boring baby stuff only for hubby to get the fun toddler bit!!) though I totally agree with the sentiment!


    1. You’re right, it probably is harder. But I just don’t want women who don’t have children yet to be completely discouraged by the notion, purely based on what they think their lives might turn out to be.

      The fact is, there are as many busy mothers who make sure to have either a job or degrees, or something which keeps them attached to ‘their’ lives, in addition to being great mums.

      I think that if you want kids, you can have them and eat lots of cake too!


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